I wonder if the Bulls win it in the end? I fell asleep in front of the penultimate episode last night and am soooooo on edge. Because they would definitely have gone to all this trouble of a 10 parter if they didn’t…
Strat to the point
FCA has updated its guidance around insurance customers in financial difficulty. Not sure it really tells you anything new – the expectation remains that insurers should be flexible. Although, interestingly, customers are advised to talk only to their insurer if they are struggling to make a payment, but to their insurer, lender (? Whatthewhat?) or insurance broker if they pay by instalments. This could just be a mistake, or, given it is FCA, there may be some baffling dark and sinister reason behind it. I shall investigate.
Teenage sips right through the night
We have discussed at unnecessary length in these annals how the absence of live sport has made lockdown seem to drag on so much longer. And as we were supposed to be looking forward to a summer of the Euros which, whisper it quietly, England were reasonably likely to win, the lack of a large set piece international tournament is all the more painful. Especially since the de facto cancellation of the Eurovision Song Contest last weekend. But I have a solution. Turn to page 38 of this excellent World Health Organisation report and marvel at the glory of the Drunk Teen Olympics. This is a league table done by Carlsberg as it sees the Danes capturing the coveted title. They narrowly edge out the Welsh – placed understandably high because if your cultural gifts to the world were Max Boyce and Shakin Stevens, you would want to drown your shame as well, however old. Scotland comes a creditable fifth (although if you turn to page 87 and the league table of “teenagers who admitted to lying to the World Health Organisation by the age of 15”, Scotland is comfortably out in the lead).
England are a disastrous 12th which is a national humiliation, especially as we are two places below the Germans (it was level after extra time by they won the shots out). We will have to respond to this debacle by appointing the first ever professional coach of our teenage drinking squad. Someone with first hand experience of the game. Wayne Rooney perhaps, or Harry Styles.
Absent from the list are both China and USA. The former because they used their disturbing influence over WHO to hide the fact that their teenagers make their Danish counterparts look positively angelic. And the latter also as a result of Chinese influence to thwart President Trump’s Make American Plastered Again campaign to encourage reckless teenage drinking because data shows that excessive alcohol consumption in early life leads to disinfectant abuse as an adult and that will develop immunity and be a beautiful thing.
Which, worryingly, doesn’t actually sound that far-fetched.
Setting our stall out
UK Government has published its draft Free Trade Agreement as part of the Brexit negotiations with EU. My analysis thus far has established that it is a staggering 292 pages long and has possibly the most unhelpful index known to man. Plus sentences that seem to run to several pages. But I shall aim for something more coherent by this time tomorrow.
I am off to see if the Bulls really did win the 1998 NBA “world” championship. Or I could just google it and save myself the bother.